Ramblings

Wow where has the time gone. Sorry I have been busy and not kept up with my blog. We are now into our 8th month of the pregnancy. Talk about emotions. I am very nervous but I normally won't admit it if asked. I want to be the best mom I can be (of coarse that is all of our goals). I am scared to death!!! I am scared about several things: breast feeding, the baby shower, the new role, the disability leave, returning to work etc. I could go on but I won't. I find comfort with other peoples blogs to help me.

Of all things yes the Baby Shower??? Why??? Well its a week away and the invites just went out. My dearest friend and another friend (of mine and my husbands) are hosting the shower. Yet I feel like its going to be a complete disaster. We initially were planning on a fun activity for girls. Since my team is only men, they wanted to be included too. So we changed it all around and made it a co -ed party. Now the guys I work with don't want to come they don't want to be around a bunch of women. Even though we are inviting there spouses and/or kids. What Drama Kings...

The changes of pregnancy -- wow !! -- my Belly is huge -- no I won't show anyone the photos. All I wanted when I found out I was pregnant (besides a healthy baby) was a cute rounded belly. I had my own belly but I wanted it to be cute and round. Well I've gotten it :). I am a little nervous about the baby and the size. We went at 32 weeks and Dr. is saying she is measuring at 4 lbs 13 oz, and 33.4 weeks. I have had a very good pregnancy spite the 2 miscarriages I have had, but I am totally freaking about the baby being bigger than normal. I asked the Dr. and he said it could be GD -- ???? I had passed the 1 hour test how could this be?

I am getting very emotional too? I saw, "Hope Floats" for probably the 20th time and I just sat and cried. I am getting more and more snappy with the husband. Which I really don't mean. I get upset really quickly. I am hungry all the time (even though I eat several small meals through out the day). I eat and eat and eat -- but yet I have lost 10 lbs since this started. I know I had plenty for the baby to take but hello.. I feel like a little piglet.
Oh and talk about being tired all the time.. Well that's me. I am always tired.

Is it wrong of me to that I am constantly worried about the little bug moving.


And to top it off husband is traveling entire month of September. What a bummer for me, I really enjoy my husband even though people are like you get a break from him. I don't want a break from him -- a day or two gone is fine but we are talking 4 weeks (only home during the weekend).

OK late enough going to bed.